I've been deeply thinking about my last relationship, since rereading my latest posts. I couldn't help but get to rehashing the devastation following the break-up. First, I intensely wondered if it would be a good investment to institute a helmet law for modern relationships ... Then, I succumbed to practicality when wondering if their should be break-up guidelines and rules, each individual should incorporate to cope with the fiasco of experiencing a bad break-up and to lessen the blow...
Here's a tidbit of advice : Always reserve a small spot for your ex somewhere in the back of your mind, because the moment you stop thinking about them all together, they'll appear in some way. Inevitably you'll be reminded of your past relationships when doing certain things or when you're visiting certain places. However, by keeping them somewhere in the back of your mind, those reminders of the memories will not be nearly as startling because you have not yet completely forgotten about them. I consider that to be a very crucial after break-up guideline. However, I'm still fully aware that some individuals will choose to attempt and completely forget about a past relationship all together. As tempting as it seems, it's definitely no small task. I know you may never want to be reminded of less than stellar past experiences, but it's inevitable. Believe me as I have been there before ... All you'll accomplish in attempting not to face your demons nor learning to accept things, is receiving reminders of them even more brutal.
I think I'd say that my second after break-up rule would have to be destroy all pictures where she looks sexy and you look happy. Destroy any avoidable bad memories. Even a super oblique glance at those photographs will bring you back to a simpler time when everything in your love life was going great. Those good memories instantly alter into bad ones, once you begin to fixate on and nitpick the past and what exactly went wrong in that relationship. Therefore I see destroying pictures as very important.
I'm super positive that my third after break-up guideline would have to be your friends. Allow me to further explain ... You'll never get through any of these rather rough experiences, no matter who it was that hurt you, without the comfort and support of your really close friends. Never lose sight of them when the relationship's all sunshine and roses because sometimes things unfortunately take a turn for the worse. When things do take the proverbial turn for the worse, that's when you will need your close friends the most.
Of course everybody is different in the way that they handle situations, and there's no existing manual that relates flawlessly written detailed information on how to 'properly' cope with an awful break-up. The best that we can do is huddle together and share experiences, taking portions from one anothers' what we will, concocting guidelines and deriving our own individual manual on what works best for us when dealing with a bad break-up. These manuals will be tweaked as time goes on and things change, eventually leaving us with our personalized 'How-To-Guide' of getting over a gut-wrenching break-up.
I'm super positive that my third after break-up guideline would have to be your friends. Allow me to further explain ... You'll never get through any of these rather rough experiences, no matter who it was that hurt you, without the comfort and support of your really close friends. Never lose sight of them when the relationship's all sunshine and roses because sometimes things unfortunately take a turn for the worse. When things do take the proverbial turn for the worse, that's when you will need your close friends the most.
Of course everybody is different in the way that they handle situations, and there's no existing manual that relates flawlessly written detailed information on how to 'properly' cope with an awful break-up. The best that we can do is huddle together and share experiences, taking portions from one anothers' what we will, concocting guidelines and deriving our own individual manual on what works best for us when dealing with a bad break-up. These manuals will be tweaked as time goes on and things change, eventually leaving us with our personalized 'How-To-Guide' of getting over a gut-wrenching break-up.
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