We begin with a story, one of those urban relationship myths. Woman [Erin] meets, Man [Erick]. Erin and Erik, partake in a first date, one of those exceptionally rare kind of dates, filled with unmistakable absolute perfection. Their second date alters into a romantic third, so on and so forth. Six "Passion-Filled-Months" transpire, and Erin and Erick begin to converse seriously of marriage. Then Erick to his dismay, unexpectedly, catches Erin in the bed, with his absolute best friend. "Hearts Break, Tears Fall, Relationships Unfortunately Cease To Exist". Perhaps, Erick may yearn for Erin's next boyfriend to be unfaithful to her, as a form of retribution.
Is there such thing as, "Relationship-Karma"? Will Erin, by some rule of "Cosmic Law", have her heart stomped on - and sooner rather than later? Or will she continue her bad-girlfriend idyll, attaining "Two-For-One-Deals", all over town, by tearing men and their friends to shreds? If the "Fates" were kind, would they not absolutely ensure, Erin, to be doomed to the exact same heartache?
Perhaps, have we been the victims, of "Relationship-Karma", ourselves? It often seems as though the shadows of one relationship follows you to the next. You may catch yourself comparing and contrasting, and their is always that period of adjustment at the beginning. Women all have their bad habits, but some have managed to take them to the next level. It's always amazing the variety that different women can bring to sloppiness and laziness [But, Us, Too Gentlemens'! As, We're Not In The Clear, That Darn' Easily!]. Have you ever felt almost haunted by the presence of a former lover?
Getting your heart broken isn't something that you can breeze through. It isn't the sort of thing that you can manage to get through all alone, either. It's when you've experienced a gut-wrenching break up that you need your buddies more than ever - so don't neglect one another, gentlemen, when the relationship is all sunshine and roses. Eventually, things might begin to stink, and you'll be glad of buddies then. After so many tears and so many break ups, you may start to look for reasons for why it all went wrong. Is it you...or is it, your "Relationship-Karma"?
The guilt of breaking someone else's heart can be every bit as bad. It will eat away at you, follow you around, remind you of it's presence in every hand-holding couple that you see. "Michael" cheated on a girlfriend once, and now is dead-positive that he will one day be cheated on by a girlfriend in return. He says it's completely inevitable. Must be that "Relationship-Karma"!
But relationships do fall apart, and women come and go. A single friend of mine said the other day, "I'm tired of them coming and going. I want one to come and stay." Well, don't we all. Willing it will not make it happen. Just like Erin and her cheating. If Erin's next boyfriend cheats on her, it's because they don't belong together. We might sit around and wonder why and pick it apart all day long and come up with nothing. Simply, you two do not belong together if one or the other cannot be faithful. Don't give me any junk about late nights and drunken parties - I don't want to hear it. Call it "Relationship Karma", call it the wrong woman, call it something to recover from - do whatever you want with it. When one woman leaves, another will be along at some point.
There's nothing karmatic about it. Men and women seek out each other's company, and eventually you will find one that just does it for you. Mostly, you'll get hurt. That is the risk of trying to fall madly in love. And let's be serious, doesn't everybody want to be madly in love?
The absolute only time that, "Relationship Karma", can really exist is when you cannot completely let go of a former relationship. Comparing your new girlfriend to your old one is usually a dangerous practice, and means that you're still thinking to much about that relationship. Even when your new girlfriend seems to outshine the old, just recognize that briefly and forget about it from then on. Old break ups have a way of rearing their ugly heads in our deepest thoughts. The "Why" and "When" and "How" and "For What Reasons" can drive you insane, until you're picking apart your new lover and your new relationship. It's good to analyze things, but all things in moderation.
Love is, after all, fifty percent blind faith. That means trust, and you have to learn how to give it even when your heart's been crushed into a thousand pieces. Give yourself some time, but learn how to trust again. Because you have to be open before you can be in love. Then "Ol' Relationship Karma", won't be quite the outstanding, issue...hopefully.
